Join Us for Our Bad Santa Airsoft Event on December 18

So once a year there's this guy that comes around and drops off gifts – maybe you've heard of him. He doesn't know about all of the wonderful things they've done with modern day shaving razors; he prefers a sleigh over a plane as his means of long-distance conveyance; and he hasn't exactly been counting calories. His name is Santa Claus and you're probably still mad at him for not giving you those airsoft weapons you wanted for Christmas when you were 10. Give the poor guy a break, though; Santa and his small but dedicated contingent of elves have an absurd number of children to make happy each year.

And for those of you who doubt his existence, we've got some news for you. Not only is he real, but he's also a contracted weapons manufacturer for the best damn military on the planet. The whole toys business is just a cover story, a bit of misdirection to keep evil-doers off his gingerbread scent. Located deep within the heart of an icy base of operations that is protected by the latest in tinsel technology and patrolled by bloodthirsty reindeer, Santa oversees a factory that pumps out more tools of destruction than Lockheed Martin could ever dream of.

This vital cog in the United States economy and defense plans has made a number of enemies over the years: kids that routinely made the naughty list by pouting for years about not getting the type of airsoft weapon they asked for. These naughty little brigands grew up and discovered each other via social networking. Today they make up the terrorist group going by the name of "Silent Knight." Their leader, Bad Santa (no, not Billy Bob Thornton), was able to deploy operatives that slipped under the noses of Cringle's defenses by utilizing poisoned carrots and cookies on the reindeer and elves, respectively.

Once inside, Silent Knight's operatives were able to take Santa hostage and have seized control of his facility. The dastardly enemies of truth, freedom and free presents are now threatening to execute "Jolly One" himself if the president doesn't meet their outlandish demands of one trillion dollars.

That's the setup for a terrorist threat that went down on… Actually, we're really not at liberty to say. The results of the actual U.S. spec ops mission to free the fat man are forever buried under red wrapping paper and those involved face the threat of waking up to coal in their stockings for the rest of their miserable lives.

Don't ask us what he had to do to come into possession of them, but Godfather Airsoft was able to obtain a copy of the plans to infiltrate the North Pole and eliminate the threat. Join us on December 18^th when we break out the airsoft weapons we did get for Christmas and reenact the event. You better believe that we plan to find out who's been naughty and nice and deal with them accordingly.